Father's Day is an Obsolete Holiday. It's one of those greeting card obligations that either gets lost in the shuffle of post-Memorial Day summer fun or dangles there like the crappy tie you just picked out for the man who (hopefully) raised you. As Father's Day approaches like the downtrodden door-to-door salesman that it is, we pay tribute to some truly Obsolete movie dads.
Chevy Chase - National Lampoon's Vacation
Clark Griswold... Where to begin? Arguably the best example of an Obsolete Dad, not to mention pure Chevy Chase, Griswold's buffoonery is matched only by his commitment to #squadgoals. This is the dad we all need -- you can emulate how much he gives a crap, and you can still look forward to one day being better than him.
Michael Keaton - Mr. Mom
Forget BATMAN. And BIRDMAN for that matter. This is prime Michael Keaton. A rather meh entry in the John Hughes writing ouevre, MR. MOM was probably seen as progressive for 1983, a push against patriarchy and Reaganomics or something -- Woman goes to work! Man stays home! Wackiness ensues! Well, watch it again. The ending is like MAD MEN by way of Preston Sturges. Except Sturges was actually progressive for his day. Obsolete AF.
Gérard Depardieu - My Father the Hero
In real life, Gérard Depardieu probably isn't exactly a model father, public urination notwithstanding. But put him in a remake of a French comedy (in which he also starred) about a divorcee fretting over jailbait daughter Katherine Heigl and you have Obsolete gold! Is Gerard still a sex symbol?
James Hampton - Teen Wolf
James Hampton is a prolific character actor/perennial That Guy, which makes him perfect to play a dad. And it pays off here. Nothing like and far superior to MTV's rehash show, TEEN WOLF earns Obsolete props for having meaning that evolves as we age. To wit: On the surface, it's about puberty, and I totally got that when I was that age. Fast forward to now, when I'm... er... when I'm 21++... and I realize the movie is about how we have NO CHOICE BUT TO BECOME OUR FATHERS. Free will is a lie. Welcome to real life, kids.
Sean Connery - Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Tom Hanks is kind of a cousin to Clark Griswold in this, but in scarier circumstances. He's the dad who cried wolf, a told-you-so kind of protector whose paranoia (spoiler alert) pays off. But it's important to remember that Henry Gibson's Dr. Werner Klopek character is also a dad with his own brood. And that's only one of the great Joe Dante onion layers on display here.
Jeffrey Jones - Mom and Dad Save the World
This is a controversial choice, and not only because Jeffrey Jones is a registered sex offender. Teri Garr's mom character is just as important to saving the world here, but this movie is so bonkers that it was Obsolete before it was released in theaters.
Of course these are just a few of the best movie dads out there. Let us know some of your favorites in the comments below!